Non-verbal cues and verbal affirmations are two distinct, yet equally crucial, components of active listening. As mentioned in the previous lesson, non-verbal cues are primarily visual signals you send to show your engagement in a conversation, including body language, facial expressions, and eye contact. These cues are often perceived subconsciously by the speaker and can significantly influence how they perceive your attentiveness and receptiveness to their message.

On the other hand, verbal affirmations are audible expressions of your engagement, such as paraphrasing the speaker's points, asking relevant questions, or providing minimal encouragers. These verbal affirmations make your understanding and involvement in the conversation explicit, thereby reinforcing the speaker's confidence in your attentiveness. Together, non-verbal cues and verbal affirmations create a rich tapestry of communication that goes beyond just hearing words, transforming it into a genuine, active listening experience.

Paraphrasing, when done genuinely, involves internalising and processing the speaker's message and restating it in your own words. When you paraphrase, strive to distill the speaker's key points and ideas into a concise reflection. This demonstrates your deeper understanding and helps the speaker feel heard and validated. It can also be a useful way to highlight any discrepancies or inconsistencies in a respectful way.

However, when paraphrasing, it is important to avoid "Parrot-phrasing", which involves simply repeating the speaker's words back to them without adding any new insight or understanding. This can come across as insincere or disingenuous and may not effectively clarify the speaker's message.

Asking relevant questions is an effective way to demonstrate your engagement and show that you're interested in learning more.

Relevant questions are inquiries directly linked to the speaker's current topic or point. They demonstrate that you're not just listening but are interested in delving deeper into the subject matter.

By asking questions, you can clarify any confusion, demonstrate your interest, explore their thoughts and feelings and encourage the speaker to share more information.

Maintain a natural communication style when communicating to ensure sincerity and authenticity. Avoid sounding scripted or forced; instead, let your genuine emotions and understanding guide your response.

Often as a result of having the best intentions, you will find yourself wanting to put together the perfect response to what someone says but if you try to force yourself to provide the perfect response, using a certain tone or language, it can come sometimes across as disingenuous and will potentially disrupt the natural flow of the conversation.

Minimal encouragers are a variety of verbal and non-verbal actions which are intended to subtly encourage a person to continue talking and help to convey your interest and understanding in what they are saying. This ensures that we remain present, so that we can do our best to ensure that the individual feels heard, listened to, valued and cared for.

Examples of verbal minimal encouragers include: “Mmm”, “Ah”, “Wow”, “I see”, “Tell me more”.

Some of the most common verbal minimal encouragers include, but are not limited to:

You also need to consider that the use of emojis can be ambiguous and open to interpretation. An example of this could be that different cultures, social groups and generations use emojis in different ways. It is always okay to clarify what they meant by using the emojis to help support them better, rather than to assume its meaning based on what you may already know.

Emojis should complement your responses, not replace them. They can be helpful in accompanying your messages but use them sparingly to avoid trivialising serious conversations. It is important to not use them inappropriately by overusing them, using them formulaically or feeling forced to use them. If these encouragers are not used well, people may fall under the impression that they are not really being listened to, and that you are just pretending to be present.

This may lead to the person feeling discouraged to talk and can dampen the trust that was previously established. Overall, minimal encouragers should feel natural to you, and can be an extremely useful tool when communicating with people if used appropriately.

When using minimal encouragers in collaboration with Active Listening strategies such as paraphrasing or reflection, the level of empathy and communication is deepened between you as an Active Listener and the individual.